Coaches And Their Choice Of Car - Mostly On Topic

[bchav307]

Not old, but "I'm a man"!

“Come after me!”

 

[bchav307]

In what world is 40 not that old? You're definitely vulnerable to the COVID.

And with this comment, you have proven my original assertion......

 

[HBCShaneDarkSide]

And with this comment, you have proven my original assertion......

You've asserted nothing.

 

[The Prophet Abides]

A lot can be learned about a person just by looking at what car they drive. It's a known fact that coaches that drive American cars are generally less respected and less literate than those that drive European and Japanese cars. This mirrors society at large though so I thought it might be useful to look at who's driving what and then make some recommendations for HBC Shane Beamer. We can safely assume he is in the market for a fresh whip based on the pay raise he just got. With his salary, he can pretty much get anything he wants short of a pristine low mileage Dodge Raider (which is just a rebadged short-wheelbase Mitsubishi Montero), then again, no one can have what does not exist.

We'll start with the GOAT - Nicky Saban Jr. - Nick is known to sport a Merc. This is a duh thing. If you're the greatest of all time at anything and you're not driving a Merc, you're inherently not the greatest. I don't want to push HBC Shane Beamer in this direction though. It would be premature. It would be like a 24 year old HRTM grad from Lancaster leasing a C Class because he accepted a job at Marriott and he used to work night shift at the Days Inn. Wait until someone other than the voice in your head tells you that you made it. Then, if your finances are correct, look into purchasing a Merc. Nothing short of an E Class will do.

Kirby Smart - Literacy is not something anyone would associate with this clown but he did read well enough to get this contract signed. Looks like he gets $1,800 a month for a car. That's more than enough to get into something sensible like a Toyota or Honda, maybe even a nice Lexus GX460 but it looks like this "tough kid from Bainbridge" is moping around in a Ford F-150. Everyone knows Ford stands for Found On Road Dead. These new twin turbo V-6 ladder frame golf club haulers are the same pieces of shit the blue oval has been cranking out for more than a century. The nav unit will go out, the headliner will peel off, the rims will chip and flake, and the dealership will charge insane amounts of money to not fix stuff. Makes sense for a Bulldogs coach.

Dabo Swinney - Say what you will about the hyper-sensitive illiterate Alabamian on the throne up in Pickens County but the dude negotiated a sweet contract in terms of his ride(s). He gets two new cars every year and a cool G a month for 93 octane and some chips. There are some well known stories about how Dabo has historically gotten around but it looks like he drives a moped day-to-day. Makes sense. If I were a betting person, I'd say he probably has a new Tahoe in the garage because every redneck thinks that's the greatest car made outside of a lifted Chevrolet truck.

I see HBC Shane Beamer as more sensible than Kirby, better bred and more literate than Dabo, and less of a dick than Saban. I'd say a nice Toyota Avalon would be the sensible thing. They offer it in a color called Ruby Flare Pearl that is basically Garnet and Toyota offers some sick warranties. Even with all the miles he'll be putting on it cruising up and down 26 and 95, it should be good for the first 10+ years of his tenure. Plus, the back seat is huge which is ideal for driving around tremendous football people. If a sedan is not desirable, a Toyota Sequoia would be another option though gas mileage will be atrocious. Honda is another solid option. The Ridgeline is a sweet truck. It drives like a car but has the hauling capacity of a light truck. Plus, those Honda V-6's sip fuel and are known to last 300k miles. Again, I could see HBC Shane Beamer driving something like this for years.

Let's talk financing. Now is a good time to negotiate with a dealership. Rates are low and they want to move inventory at the end of the year. I don't know if HBC Shane Beamer would be financing or paying cash but I'll assume the latter because of the strength of his contract and his general comportment leads me to believe that he's fiscally responsible and after the age of 30 probably stopped financing most things other than real estate. That said, a lease might be a good option. If he knows that he's going to upgrade every couple of years, why not lease it? They offer low mileage and high mileage leases with service plans. These deals can be very attractive to the right buyer.

I think by year 6 HBC Shane Beamer will be winning 10+ games and really upsetting Clemson and Georgia people. In my opinion, after that first 10 win season, it's Mercedes time. Again, sedan vs SUV is debatable but by that time I would imagine that Mercedes will be offering some cool all electric vehicles. I would go in this direction and embrace a more progressive and literate image than the competition. Southern football isn't known for it's progressive mindset but HBC Shane Beamer should be the exception rather than the rule in all things. I think the image of a clean cut coach driving a $100,000 electric Mercedes is exactly where we want to be in a few years.

Is there any scenario where coach shocks the fan base by purchasing some type of Subaru rally car or maybe an old school 90s Mitsubishi Montero?

I think something like that could really get the fans fired up for his first season.

Go Cocks!

 

[gr8spur]

In what world is 40 not that old? You're definitely vulnerable to the COVID.

What’s wrong with you, HBC? Several of your posts on this string display an ugly attitude toward “older” fans. Would your parents be proud of you for this?

 

[HBCShaneDarkSide]

Is there any scenario where coach shocks the fan base by purchasing some type of Subaru rally car or maybe an old school 90s Mitsubishi Montero?

I think something like that could really get the fans fired up for his first season.

Go Cocks!

A Mitsubishi 3000GT VR-4 would really do it for me

 

[HBCShaneDarkSide]

What’s wrong with you, HBC? Several of your posts on this string display an ugly attitude toward “older” fans. Would your parents be proud of you for this?

My parents are UGA fans so who cares?

 

[importcock]

My parents are UGA fans so who cares?

That explains a lot, lol.

 

[NetworkX]

I'm not a mechanic but I have some cars that stay needing wrenching on and my mechanic buddies all trash BMW drivetrains. Poor longevity and bad oil leaks. That said, I rode in a brand new X3 the other night to an expensive ass dinner in the Old 4th Ward in ATL and that interior was PPPLLLUUUSSSHHH.

They are fun to drive.

 

[Ghostang]

You're a scientist, sir. I, for one, am hoping Beamer hires you on as an analyst.

 

[TheReelEss]

I am pretty sure Danny Ford kept driving his old pickup truck after they bought him a Corvette.

People who own Corvettes have to have a backup, reliable vehicle.

 

[TheReelEss]

Made me think of an old joke. When I finished law school in the 1970s one of my classmates, whose self-image always exceeded his skill-set, showed up for the bar exam in a sparkling new BMW. It was the small one, but still. We all kind of shook our heads, until one wag asked "What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? Answer: The pricks are on the outside of the porcupine."

As long as I'm telling BMW stories, here's one more. I was helping out in our Manhattan office in 2002. The office is at the very foot of the island, in the financial district. One of the younger lawyers up there and I headed out of the building for a late afternoon cup of coffee. Greg is a good enough guy, but he is a pure Upper West Side New Yorker. He has never lived elsewhere. Well, we were waiting to cross the street to the Starbucks and a Cobalt Blue Z4 pulls up next to us. Greg said, "I really like those cars." Me: "I do too." G: "I doubt you see many cars like that in South Carolina." Me, somewhat stunned, "Greg, we have factory workers driving those cars all over upstate South Carolina. That car was made in South Carolina." He was a little bit chagrined.

I had a friend whose realty business was faltering during the Great Recession. He turned up in a nice used red Lexus sedan. I old him how pretty it was and he said "It was probably $10 grand less than your truck." Little did he know how cheaply I got my truck.

 

[HBCShaneDarkSide]

That explains a lot, lol.

It doesn't explain as much as you might think.

 

[HBCShaneDarkSide]

People who own Corvettes have to have a backup, reliable vehicle.

Even the newer ones? I've read that the C5 Z06 is one of the best budget supercars out there. Looks like clean examples can be had for around $20k.

 

[Forever Fowl]

When SOS was here he drove a Lincoln.

 

[Carolina Doc]

I do know that Ray Tanner drives a leased Infiniti QX80.....

 

[SCExile]

...It's a known fact that coaches that drive American cars are generally less respected and less literate than those that drive European and Japanese cars....

It is a known fact that most "known facts" aren't facts at all.

 

[TheReelEss]

Even the newer ones? I've read that the C5 Z06 is one of the best budget supercars out there. Looks like clean examples can be had for around $20k.

Well, that's a nice car. My bro-in-law has one. He hasn't experienced many issues with his. But he hardly ever drives it. It never moves from his garage. He knocked the driver's mirror off once in a tight parking garage. He got it for $17K.

 

[Harvard Gamecock]

All garbage cars. The Tesla is ok but the model x sucks.

 

[PINERIDGEROOSTER]

I do know that Ray Tanner drives a leased Infiniti QX80.....

Seen Frank Martin driving one as well

 

[HBCShaneDarkSide]

It is a known fact that most "known facts" aren't facts at all.

Well said.

 

[HBCShaneDarkSide]

HARVARD BOI!

 

[HBCShaneDarkSide]

Well, that's a nice car. My bro-in-law has one. He hasn't experienced many issues with his. But he hardly ever drives it. It never moves from his garage. He knocked the driver's mirror off once in a tight parking garage. He got it for $17K.

Yeah, they will flat get it.

 

[OzWizard]

According to ol Lou, you gotta pick an exquisite shade of beige.

was just about to say that....I saw Hotlz still driving this car when I was living in Cola.

 

[PHIL46]

Forget the Land Cruiser, the Toyota Sequoia is the best SUV on the road. I'm on my second one a 2012 with 174k on it and it runs like a brand new one. I got the original one when they came out in 2002. It had 198000 mile on it when I sold it and got the one I have now. It was in excellent condition. I have to admit gas mileage is not good, but for ride and room you can't beat it.

 

[HBCShaneDarkSide]

Forget the Land Cruiser, the Toyota Sequoia is the best SUV on the road. I'm on my second one a 2012 with 174k on it and it runs like a brand new one. I got the original one when they came out in 2002. It had 198000 mile on it when I sold it and got the one I have now. It was in excellent condition. I have to admit gas mileage is not good, but for ride and room you can't beat it.

We need to wait and see what the new one is going to be like. I drive a GX470, basically a Prado, as my daily. HBC Shane Beamer could rock the LC no prob. Maybe his first bowl game he earns that privilege?

Agree tho, the Sequoia is a better daily car. HUGE interior, capable enough off road, Toyota V-8's are awesome, etc and so forth.

 

[TheReelEss]

Actually, it's the teams with players who drive cars nicer than their coaches who are successful.

 

[coolcock2001]

Actually, it's the teams with players who drive cars nicer than their coaches who are successful.

Tweet related:

 

[Silverspur02]

I’m 40..... not that old

 

[allyourbase]

What’s wrong with you, HBC? Several of your posts on this string display an ugly attitude toward “older” fans. Would your parents be proud of you for this?

To be fair, I've seen a bunch more oldsters on this forum attack the younger generations than vice versa. This coming from an oldster. If you can't take it, don't dish it out. Generations attacking each other is so stupid. Anyone who reads history knows that this kind of generational sniping is as old as Methuselah and as stale as week old bread from the gas station.

 

[The Prophet Abides]

Bump

 

[Southern Fried Chicken]

A lot can be learned about a person just by looking at what car they drive. It's a known fact that coaches that drive American cars are generally less respected and less literate than those that drive European and Japanese cars.

I've always considered myself a pretty good Bullshit Artist but, I must admit, it is a pleasure and an honor to meet a true professional who truly doesn't know what the hell they are talking about.

KNOWN FACT, huh??? Did you just think that up??? Reference Source? Cool opinion ... NOT.

Frank McGuire = Kelly Green Eldorado. Top that!
Coach McGuire had more class and respect than both Carolinas combined.

 

[Southern Fried Chicken]

The problem with our culture exemplified in one post.....

There are 2 S's in ASS. No dollar $ign$.

 

[Neanderthal]

Actually, it's the teams with players who drive cars nicer than their coaches who are successful.

Drive through the players parking lot while practice is in session and look what’s there. Some nice vehicles, some great trucks.

 

[Southern Fried Chicken]

I’m 40..... not that old

I wear over-the-calf support hose that are over 40 years old and average getting laid 3 times a week. Women love men with experience.

 

[Southern Fried Chicken]

OP is clearly younger as any car guy above 40 knows a Merc is most definitely a Mercury.....

Now hang on for just one second. Quit knocking and laughing at all these young whippersnappers. If those young studs hadn't invented sex, what would us old farts do on Saturday nights and Sunday afternoons... watch football? And they never even notice their wives never complain about them watching football all weekend.