Why is it that we look for argument rather than agreement

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DeepfriedCock

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Jan 30, 2017
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Seems like every post starts out with a statement or an observation (sports or politics) and instead of listening and trying to hear and understand another's point of view we immediately look for a reason to disagree. And we don't just attack the words; we call each other names. I've always wondered why we don't just listen and practice the ability to find common ground?

It is another way of saying, why is there so much hate and anger. It's not just here - it is everywhere. James Baldwin says, "people hold to their anger and hate because without it they would have to face their fear and pain." (paraphrase)

I think he might be right.
Do you really think someone would hate someone on a message board? This Message board takes about 20 minutes out of most posters day. The other 23hrs and 40 minutes this board doesn't cross anybody's mind. Anybody that takes this board serious, and would hate someone on this board has a extremely boring life.
 

Rollerdude123

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Apr 8, 2011
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Do you really think someone would hate someone on a message board? This Message board takes about 20 minutes out of most posters day. The other 23hrs and 40 minutes this board doesn't cross anybody's mind. Anybody that takes this board serious, and would hate someone on this board has a extremely boring life.

Yes. For sure.
 

BigTomE

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May 5, 2015
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Seems like every post starts out with a statement or an observation (sports or politics) and instead of listening and trying to hear and understand another's point of view we immediately look for a reason to disagree. And we don't just attack the words; we call each other names. I've always wondered why we don't just listen and practice the ability to find common ground?

It is another way of saying, why is there so much hate and anger. It's not just here - it is everywhere. James Baldwin says, "people hold to their anger and hate because without it they would have to face their fear and pain." (paraphrase)

I think he might be right.
Social media made you all way too comfortable with disrespecting people and not getting punched in the face for it.”
Mike Tyson
 

jedi_mike

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Mar 29, 2008
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The guys I play golf with probably 99% pro trump.Sometimes while we waiting around for others to show up or tee off,the conversation gets political,I stay out of it and just listen. Sometimes my best friend injects and says “he’s a Democrat”,I just say back I’m not one but don’t like the idiot and leave it at that.Im there to play golf with my friends and to have a good time.There hasn’t been one blow up yet but when 99% is like minded,there shouldn’t be.They all super nice guys.
 

Rollerdude123

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Apr 8, 2011
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The guys I play golf with probably 99% pro trump.Sometimes while we waiting around for others to show up or tee off,the conversation gets political,I stay out of it and just listen. Sometimes my best friend injects and says “he’s a Democrat”,I just say back I’m not one but don’t like the idiot and leave it at that.Im there to play golf with my friends and to have a good time.There hasn’t been one blow up yet but when 99% is like minded,there shouldn’t be.They all super nice guys.


i dont really hang out with anyone that is a trump fan. I don’t hang out with anyone really outside of my family.

everyone that knows me knows I think trump is a pile of vomit and I don’t hold that opinion back if they want to talk politics.

My wife’s friends are pretty anti trump- which is what all the polls show that suburban college educated women generally do Not support trump.
 

Jbouton2

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Jun 27, 2020
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i dont really hang out with anyone that is a trump fan. I don’t hang out with anyone really outside of my family.
Wow, you seem like a well rounded individual. I enjoy that I have friends where we agree and sometimes agree to disagree, LOL. We respect each others view, of course we do "jab" each other on some subjects.

everyone that knows me knows I think trump is a pile of vomit and I don’t hold that opinion back if they want to talk politics.

My wife’s friends are pretty anti trump- which is what all the polls show that suburban college educated women generally do Not support trump.
 

jedi_mike

Member
Mar 29, 2008
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i dont really hang out with anyone that is a trump fan. I don’t hang out with anyone really outside of my family.

everyone that knows me knows I think trump is a pile of vomit and I don’t hold that opinion back if they want to talk politics.

My wife’s friends are pretty anti trump- which is what all the polls show that suburban college educated women generally do Not support trump.
Other than there support for him ,they’re really a good bunch of guys.i don’t use golf as a way to try and change their mind.i use golf to get away from it.
 

Rollerdude123

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Apr 8, 2011
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Wow, you sound like a well rounded individual. I enjoy that I have friends where we agree and sometimes agree to disagree, LOL. We respect each others view, of course we do "jab" each other on some subjects.

Everyone is different.

At this time in my life, I don’t enjoy spending time with those that look up and respect someone like trump.

has it cost some (a few) friendships. Yes.

One was a guy I considered to be a mentor. We had known each other for 24 years. He basically trained me in my career. But when Trump was running for election and said terrible things about Mexicans, my friend said some things that were very hateful and very unChristian over a lunch we had together About Mexican people. It was out of left field for him. He had a lot of hate in his heart that came out about groups of people.. I just didn’t want to be around someone like that anymore.

Life is too short to hang around with people like that.
 
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OldWiseCock

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Apr 3, 2019
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I pray every day to be a good listener. I also try to understand others who disagree with me, I fail at times on this. The OP makes great points on this. Thanks for the reminder, I need this from time to time.
I do too Jbouton2. I fail, but I keep praying and keep trying. The most rewarding conversations I've ever had were with people I had fundamental disagreements with until I listened.
 

Roger Moore

Member
Nov 19, 2006
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Seems like every post starts out with a statement or an observation (sports or politics) and instead of listening and trying to hear and understand another's point of view we immediately look for a reason to disagree. And we don't just attack the words; we call each other names. I've always wondered why we don't just listen and practice the ability to find common ground?

It is another way of saying, why is there so much hate and anger. It's not just here - it is everywhere. James Baldwin says, "people hold to their anger and hate because without it they would have to face their fear and pain." (paraphrase)

I think he might be right.
Your "handle" well fits you, sir.
 
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